New Irish Comedies eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 125 pages of information about New Irish Comedies.

New Irish Comedies eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 125 pages of information about New Irish Comedies.

Mrs. Broderick: I knew of a man that was butler in a big house was bit, and they tied him first and smothered him after, and his master shot the dog.  A splendid shot he was; the thing he’d not see he’d hit it the same as the thing he’d see.  I heard that from an outside neighbour of my own, a woman that told no lies.

Shawn Early: Sure, they did the same thing to a high-up lady over in England, and she after being bit by her own little spaniel and it having a ring around its neck.

Peter Tannian: That is the only best thing to do.  Whether the bite is from a dog, or a cat, or whatever it may be, to put the quilt and the blankets on the person and smother him in the bed.  To smother them out-and-out you should, before the madness will work.

Hyacinth Halvey: I’d be loth he to be shot or smothered.  I’d sooner to give him a chance in the asylum.

Mrs. Broderick: To keep him there and to try him through three changes of the moon.  It’s well for you, Bartley, Mr. Halvey being in charge of you, that is known to be a tender man.

Peter Tannian: He to have got a bite and to go biting others, he would put in them the same malice.  It is the old people used to tell that down, and they must have had some reason doing that.

Shawn Early: To get a bite of a dog you must chance your life.  There is no doubt at all about that.  It might work till the time of the new moon or the full moon, and then they must be shot or smothered.

Hyacinth Halvey: It is a pity there to be no cure found for it in the world.

Shawn Early: There never came out from the Almighty any cure for a mad dog.

   (Bartley Fallon has been edging towards door.)

Shawn Early: Oh! stop him and keep a hold of him, Mr. Halvey!

Hyacinth Halvey: Stop where you are.

Bartley Fallon: Isn’t it enough to have madness before me, that you will not let me go fall in my own choice place?

Hyacinth Halvey: The neighbours would think it bad of me to let a raving man out into their midst.

Bartley Fallon: Is it to shoot me you are going?

Hyacinth Halvey: I will call to the doctor to say is the padded room at the workhouse the most place where you will be safe, till such time as it will be known did the poison wear away.

Bartley Fallon: I will not go in it!  It is likely I might be forgot in it, or the nurses to be in dread to bring me nourishment, and they to hear me barking within the door.  I’m thinking it was allotted by nature I never would die an easy death.

Hyacinth Halvey: I will keep a watch over you myself.

Bartley Fallon: Where’s the use of that the time the breath will be gone out of me, and you maybe playing cards on my coffin, and I having nothing around or about me but the shroud, and the habit, and the little board?

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New Irish Comedies from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.