“This stone is inscribed to the memory of Mr. Thomas Abbott, of Swaffham, in the county of Norfolk, attorney-at-law, who died lamented by his friends, (enemies he had none,) after a painful and tedious illness, which he bore with patience, resignation, and fortitude becoming a man.  Departed this life August the 16th, Anno Domini 1762, aged 48.”

  “Here lieth one, (believe it if you can,)
  Who, though an attorney, was an honest man. 
  The gates of heaven for him shall open wide,
  But will be shut against all the tribe beside.”

T.R.

* * * * *

A celebrated gunaiphilist having asked a friend with whom he was walking, if the woman they had just met was not very passable, the other replied, “Undoubtedly she was, or I had never got by her, while you were with me at least.”

HEBES.

* * * * *

A WEDDING.

A tragic-comic meeting, compounded of favours, footmen, faintings, farewells, prayers, parsons, plumcakes, rings, refreshments, bottles, blubberings, God bless-ye’s, and gallopings away in a post-chaise and four.

* * * * *

CHARADE.

A natural production, neither animal, vegetable, nor mineral, neither male nor female, yet often produced between both; it exists from two to six feet high, is often spoken of in romances, and strongly recommended by precept, example, and Holy Writ.—­A kiss.

* * * * *

Extempore written during the time some medical pupils were considering how they should remove the heart of a young woman deceased, whom the friends allowed them to open, on condition that they took no part away:—­

  St. Thomas’s pupils, I cannot help grieving,
    To think it should ever be said,
  That we, who so oft steal girls’ hearts whilst they’re living,
    Should steal them as well when they’re dead.

  We’re admitted in confidence, and with reliance
    The friends on our honour depend;
  We have given the pledge, then disgrace not the science,
    By stealing the heart from a friend.

E.C.

* * * * *

Sir Isaac Newton was, it is well known, extremely fond of employing his leisure hours in fishing.  Being one day asked by a fellow-collegian how it happened that so vast a genius could stoop to a pursuit so trifling at the best, replied, “How is it possible that you should be surprised at my being a lover of the angle?”

HEBES.

* * * * *

LIMBIRD’S EDITION OF THE

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