“’My friend, I observe that you are serving us, and we are proud, but you do not appear to be serving a purpose,’ I said.

“‘Now, don’t spoil it all with your relentless logic,’ she began.  ’You see, I am going to take a hand in this keeping-up-with-Lizzie business.  One of our ladies had to give up a dinner-party the other day, because her butlers had left suddenly.’

“’"Why didn’t you and a maid serve the dinner yourselves?” I said.

“’"Impossible!” was her proud answer.

“’"It would have been a fine lark.  I would have done it,” I said.

“’"I’d like to see you,” she laughed.

“‘"You shall,” I answered, and here I am.’

“Now, there were certain smiles which led me to suspect that it was a blow aimed at one of the ladies who sat at the table with us, but of that I am not sure.

“‘I’m also getting my hand in,’ our hostess went on.  ’Bill and I are going to try the simple life.  Tomorrow we move into the log-cabin, where we shall do our own work, and send the servants off for a week’s holiday.  I’m going to do the cooking—­I’ve been learning how—­and I shall make the beds, and Bill is to chop the wood, and help wash the dishes, and we shall sleep out-of-doors.  It will, I hope, be a lesson to some of these proud people around us who are living beyond their means.  That’s good, isn’t it?’

“‘Excellent!’ I exclaimed, as the others laughed.

“‘Incidentally, it will help me to reduce,’ she added.

“‘An’ it promises to reduce Bill,’ I said.  ’It will kill Bill, I fear, but it will pay.  You might change your plan a little—­Just a little—­an’ save poor Bill.  Think of eating biscuit an’ flapjacks from the hand of a social leader!  Between the millstones of duty and indigestion he will be sadly ground, but with the axe he may, if he will, defend his constitution.’

“‘Well, what’s a constitution between husband and wife?’ she asked.  “‘Nothin’.’  I says.  ’Bear in mind I wouldn’t discourage you.  With the aid of the axe his ancestors were able to withstand the assaults of pork an’ beans an’ pie.  If he uses it freely, he is safe.’

“’You see, I shall have him in a position where he must work or die,’ said Mrs. Bill.

“‘He’ll die,’ said a guest.

“‘I call it a worthy enterprise whatever the expense,’ I said.  ’It will set a fashion here an’ a very good one.  In this community there are so many dear ladies who are prisoners of gravitation.  They rely almost exclusively on hired hands an’ feet, an’ are losin’ the use o’ their own.  What confusion will spread among them when they learn that Mrs. William Henry Warburton, the richest woman in Fairfield County, and the daughter of a bishop, has been doin’ her own work!  What consternation!  What dismay!  What female profanity!  What a revision of habits an’ resolutions!  Why, there’s been nothin’ like it since the descent of Lizzie.’