“Jocasta Surd!” I remarked in surprise, “Abscissa’s aunt!”

“The same,” he said, sadly.  “I will not attempt to conceal that upon the maiden Jocasta my maiden heart has been bestowed.  Give me your hand, my nephew in affliction as in affection!”

Rivarol dashed away a not discreditable tear, and resumed: 

“My only hope lies in this discovery of perpetual motion.  It will give me the fame, the wealth.  Can Jocasta refuse these?  If she can, there is only the trap-door and—­Kerguellen’s Land!”

I bashfully asked to see the perpetual-motion machine.  My uncle in affliction shook his head.

“At another time,” he said.  “Suffice it at present to say, that it is something upon the principle of a woman’s tongue.  But you see now why we must turn in your case to the alternative condition—­infinite speed.  There are several ways in which this may be accomplished, theoretically.  By the lever, for instance.  Imagine a lever with a very long and a very short arm.  Apply power to the shorter arm which will move it with great velocity.  The end of the long arm will move much faster.  Now keep shortening the short arm and lengthening the long one, and as you approach infinity in their difference of length, you approach infinity in the speed of the long arm.  It would be difficult to demonstrate this practically to the Professor.  We must seek another solution.  Jean Marie will meditate.  Come to me in a fortnight.  Good-night.  But stop!  Have you the money—­das Geld?”

“Much more than I need.”

“Good!  Let us strike hands.  Gold and Knowledge; Science and Love.  What may not such a partnership achieve?  We go to conquer thee, Abscissa. Vorwaerts!”

When, at the end of a fortnight, I sought Rivarol’s chamber, I passed with some little trepidation over the terminus of the Air Line to Kerguellen’s Land, and evaded the extended arms of the Petty Cash Adjuster.  Rivarol drew a mug of ale for me, and filled himself a retort of his own peculiar beverage.

“Come,” he said at length.  “Let us drink success to the TACHYPOMP.”

“The TACHYPOMP?”

“Yes.  Why not? Tachu, quickly, and pempo, pepompa to send.  May it send you quickly to your wedding-day.  Abscissa is yours.  It is done.  When shall we start for the prairies?”

“Where is it?” I asked, looking in vain around the room for any contrivance which might seem calculated to advance matrimonial prospects.

“It is here,” and he gave his forehead a significant tap.  Then he held forth didactically.