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THE SCHLOSS BILLET.

We had not expected much of a billet in a defeated and starving country; that was probably why everybody was enthusiastic over it—­at first.  I, as billeting officer, was especially proud of having discovered it.  The very thing for Brigade Headquarters—­secluded, dignified, commanding and spacious.

A couple of kilos from the gates through the drive brings you to the Schloss.  Entering a hall about the size of a modern theatre you journey to the ante-room, a vast apartment, which for space compares favourably with the Coliseum at Rome.  A world-exhibition of pictures and tapestries covers the walls of the Schloss, while an acre or two of painted ceiling shows the chief events of German history, from the Creation to the Franco-Prussian War.

In the Dining-room, reached by a progress over carpets and rugs representative of all the best periods of Oriental art, it would be fairly easy to stage a review on the table itself; while in the Music-room a hundred or so lorries could be parked without attracting observation too glaringly.  Should the need arise, the Library could accommodate a battalion on parade, a rifle range or sufficient office room for Q branch of a division.  A labyrinth of corridors and servants’ bedrooms harbours the rank and file, and it is said that the number of kitchens, pantries and cellars in the north and east wings runs into three figures.

The Divisional Commander called it “homely”; the Corps Commander remarked that its style was “not cramped, anyhow—­what?” and the Army Commander pronounced it very “cosy.”

The first two days I did not see my servant at all.  On Wednesday he turned up just before lunch.  On Monday and Tuesday, he explained, he had wandered through corridors and passages trying to find my room, and, by rising an hour before reveille, he thought he would be able to get from his quarters to mine by about breakfast-time.

We used to adjourn to the billiard-room after dinner, but gave it up because it was necessary to stop play at half-past ten in order to be in bed by midnight.  Signals is worried because he has not enough line left to reach Battalions, all available supplies having been used up in connecting the General’s room with various parts of the Schloss.  We are continually late for dinner owing to errors in judging the distances from one room to another.  Our once happy family has dissolved into silent morose individuals, for we have grown strange and distant to one another.  Liaison between departments has broken down, and the Staff-Captain whom I saw yesterday in the distance is suffering from premature decay.

But a solution has been found, for the Engineers are unloading a couple of Nissen huts to put up in the hall, and we shall soon be a united family once more.

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    “The surveyor said that as things were at present he had little
    or no authority over the men who, for the most part, simply
    considered him his equal.”—­Trade Paper.