Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, Jan. 8, 1919 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 42 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, Jan. 8, 1919.

Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, Jan. 8, 1919 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 42 pages of information about Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, Jan. 8, 1919.

Two nominations which have been the cause of great satisfaction in diplomatic circle are those of Mr. MARK HAMBOURG to the Kingdom of Palestine, and that of M. MOISEIWITCH to the throne of the Solomon Islands.  Jamborees of jubilation are already rife in the latter locality.

Sir HENRY WOOD has been simultaneously approached from two quarters.  The leading citizens of Sonora have offered him the Presidentship of that interesting State.  At the same time an urgent invitation has been sent to the eminent conductor offering him the throne of the Empire of Percussia.  Sir HENRY’S decision is awaitod with feverish anxiety.

It is stated by the Corriere della Sera that Madame MELBA, the Australian nightingale, has been chosen to preside over the Jug-jugo-Slav Republic, while Madame CLARA BUTT has been unanimously elected Empress of Patagonia.

Sir THOMAS BEECHAM’S selection from among the candidates for the throne of New Guinea, is regarded as a foregone conclusion.  The famous violinist, Mr. ALBERT SAMMONS, has so far returned no final answer to the offer of the Crown of Sordinia, but it is believed that he cannot long remain mute to the touching appeal of the signatories.  A favourable answer is also expected from Mlle. Jelly Aranyi, who has been nominated Queen of Guava.

On the other hand Sir EDWARD ELGAR, O.M., has steadfastly declined the Tsardom of Bulgaria, even though it was proposed to change the name of the country to Elgaria.

* * * * *

[Illustration:  Milliner.  “HOW DOES MODOM LIKE THIS LITTLE BIRD OF PARADISE MODEL?  IT BECOMES MODOM VERY WELL.”

Customer.  “YES, IT IS RATHER NICE, BUT (remembers her obligations as a mother) HOW MANY COUPONS?”]

* * * * *

TO AN EGYPTIAN BOY.

  Child of the gorgeous East, whose ardent suns
    Have kissed thy velvet skin to deeper lustre
      And given thine almond eyes
      A look more calm and wise
    Than any we pale Westerners can muster,
  Alas! my mean intelligence affords
  No clue to grasp the meaning of the words
    Which vehemently from thy larynx leap. 
  How is it that the liquid language runs?
    “Nai—­sori
ng
—­trif—­erwonbi—­aster—­ferish—­ip.”

  E’en so, methinks, did CLEOPATRA WOO
    Her vanquished victor, couched on scented roses,
      And PHARAOH from his throne
      With more imperious tone
    Addressed in some such terms rebellious MOSES;
  And esoteric priests in Theban shrines,
  Their ritual conned from hieroglyphic signs,
    Thus muttered incantations dark and deep
  To Isis and Osiris, Thoth and Shu: 
    “Nai—­sori
ng
—­trif—­erwonbi—­aster—­ferish—­ip.”

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Project Gutenberg
Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 156, Jan. 8, 1919 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.