An’, with that, Sonny he up an’ picks up a’ orange an’ a’ apple off the teacher’s desk, an’ says he, “This orange is the earth, an’ this here apple is the sun.”  An’, with that, he explained all they is to total eclipses.  I can’t begin to tell you thess how he expressed it, because I ain’t highly edjercated myself, an’ I don’t know the specifactions.  But when he had got thoo, he turned to the teacher, an’ says he, “Is they anything else thet you’d like to know about total eclipses?” An’ teacher says, says he, “Oh, no; not at all.”

They do say thet them graduates hadn’t never went so far ez total eclipses, an’ teacher wouldn’t ‘a’ had the subject mentioned to ’em for nothin’; but I don’t say that’s so.

Well, then, Sonny he turned around, an’ looked at the company, an’ he says, “Is everybody satisfied?” An’ all the mothers an’ fathers nodded their heads “yes.”

An’ then he waited thess a minute, an’ he says, says he, “Well, now I’ll put the next question: 

“Sonny Jones,” says he, “what is the difference between dew an’ rain an’ fog an’ hail an’ sleet an’ snow!

“Is that a hard enough question?”

[Illustration:  “‘This orange is the earth, an’ this here apple is the sun.’”]

Well, from that he started in, an’ he didn’t stop tell he had expounded about every kind of dampness that ever descended from heaven or rose from the earth.  An’ after that, why, he went on a-givin’ out one question after another, an’ answerin ’em, tell everybody had declared theirselves entirely satisfied that he was fully equipped to gradj’ate—­an’, tell the truth, I don’t doubt thet a heap of ’em felt their minds considerably relieved to have it safe-t over with without puttin’ their grad’jates to shame, when what does he do but say, “Well, ef you’re satisfied, why, I am—­an’ yet,” says he, “I think I would like to ask myself one or two hard questions more, thess to make shore.”  An’ befo’ anybody could stop him, he had said: 

“Sonny Jones, what is the reason thet a bird has feathers and a dog has hair?” An’ then he turned around deliberate, an’ answered:  “I don’t know.  Teacher, please put that question to the class.”

Teacher had kep’ his temper purty well up to this time, but I see he was mad now, an’ he riz from his chair, an’ says he:  “This examination has been declared finished, an’ I think we have spent ez much time on it ez we can spare.”  An’ all the mothers they nodded their heads, an’ started a-whisperin’—­most impolite.

An’ at that, Sonny, why, he thess set down as modest an’ peaceable ez anything; but ez he was settin’ he remarked that he was in hopes thet some o’ the reg’lars would ‘a’ took time to answer a few questions thet had bothered his mind f’om time to time—­an’ of c’ose they must know; which, to my mind, was the modes’est remark a boy ever did make.

Well, sir, that’s the way this diplomy was earned—­by a good, hard struggle, in open daylight, by unanymous vote of all concerned—­an’ unconcerned, for that matter.  An’ my opinion is thet if they are those who have any private opinions about it, an’ they didn’t express ’em that day, why they ain’t got no right to do it underhanded, ez I am sorry to say has been done.