[Footnote 1:  The Holy Prepuce is at Rome in the Church of St. John Lateran; it is also at St. James of Compostelia in Spain; at Anvers; in the Abbey of St. Corneille at Compiegne; at Our Lady of the Dove, in the diocese of Chartres, in the Cathedral of Puy-en-Velay; and in several other places (Voltaire, Dictionnaire philosophique).

The Able X...., author of Maudit also places the holy fragment in the church of Chanoux (Vienne) and asserts that a Bishop of Chalone in the 18th century threw a pattern of it into the river.]

[Footnote 2:  Ainsi parchait a Sinay un caphar, qui Sainct Antoine mettoit le feu es jambes; Sainct Eutrope faisait les hydropiques; Sainct Gildas les fols; Sainct Genou les gouttes.  Mais je le punis en tel exemple, quoi qu’il m’appelast heretique, que depuis ce temps caphar quiconque n’est ause entrer en mes terres.

Et m’esbahi si vostre roi les laisse perscher par son royaulme tels scandales.  Car plus sont a punir que ceulx qui par art magique ou sultre engin auraient mis la peste par le pays.  La peste ne tue que le corps, mais tels imposteurs empoisennent les ames. (Rabelais).]

LXIV.

THE TWO AUGURS.

  “I am surprised that two augurs
  can look at one another without laughing.”

  CATO.

—­Ave Marcellus! said the old Cure, giving his nephew a paternal embrace; how are you, my poor boy?

—­I am very well, replied Marcel.

—­No! your servant has told me that you have been unwell for some time.

—­She is really too kind.  You have been talking to her then?

—­Yes, while waiting for you.  She seems to me a worthy and intelligent person, but a little irritated with you.  Do you live badly together?

Marcel coloured.

—­Come, the blush of holy modesty is covering your face.  Don’t do so, child, don’t we all know what it is, my dear fellow?

—­Indeed, much you ought to know what these women are.  They are cross-grained and stubborn, and claim to be the mistresses of the house, especially with priests younger than themselves.

—­That is the inconvenience of our condition, Monsieur le Cure.  What will you?  We must pass it over.  But, tell me, she is not so old as that.  Ah, come, the maiden’s blush again!  I do not want to offend your virtuous feelings any longer, and I am going to talk to you about something else.  You know I have centred all my ambition on you, that I occupy myself about you only, and that together with my saint and my salvation, you are the sole object of my care.  Therefore, you can explain my indignation and wrath at seeing my pupil buried in this frightful village, at seeing you extinguishing your brilliant qualities, having no other stimulant for your intellect than your Sunday sermons and your stupid peasants, no other emotion than your disputes with your cook.  I have therefore asked of the Lord one thing only, only one. Unam petii a Domino, hanc requiram.  You know what it is—­your promotion.  Well, Monsieur le Cure.  I come to tell you that everything is going as it were on wheels.