Little Willie was nearly delirious by this time, and tried to get into the basket, which was now all but empty.  The search continued, and two rolls of material were lifted out:  five and a quarter yards of white calico and three yards of pink silk.  This exposed the bottom of the basket, where lay a tin!  Ah, the opium at last.  Philip stepped forward and prised off the lid triumphantly.

The contents consisted solely of Punter’s “Freak” biscuits.

Little Willie has been dismissed from his position as Opium Sleuth-hound.

* * * * *

[Illustration:  THE FAVOURED UNIFORM.

Indignant Lady.  “I SUPPOSE I’D HAVE HAD A CHANCE IF I’D HAD BREECHES ON.”]

* * * * *

COMMERCIAL CANDOUR.

    “For Sale, owing to ill-health, Pedigree Flemish Stock.”—­Daily
    Paper.

* * * * *

THE EXODUS.

  Like the last rose of Summer
    I’m left quite alone;
  All my blooming companions
    To Paris are flown—­
  Three daughters, two brothers,
    Two sons and a niece
  Have all gone to Paris
    To speed up the Peace.

  ’Tis just the same story
    Wherever I go,
  There’s hardly a soul left
    For running the show—­
  Five thousand officials,
    Not counting police,
  Have all gone to Paris
    To speed up the Peace.

  There’s calm in the City,
    A hush in Whitehall—­
  A thousand fair typists
    Have answered the call. 
  Henceforward their clicking
    In London will cease—­
  They’ve all gone to Paris
    To speed up the Peace.

      P.S. 
  An expert accountant. 
    Has worked out the cost
  Of the keep of officials
    Who’ve recently crossed. 
  It must be Three Millions;
    Mayhap ’twill increase
  If the delegates dally
    In speeding up Peace.

* * * * *

    “THE THAMES RISING.

    “LONDON MILK SUPPLY THREATENED.”—­Pall Mall Gazette.

A surprising change of affairs.

* * * * *

    “Sprats in South London are 21/2 lb. a lb.”—­Continental Daily
    Mail.

This may explain why our fishmonger’s price is 21/2 shillings a shillingsworth.

* * * * *

    “The story of an ingenious robbery by three young boys was told to
    the Stockport magistrates to-day.

    “The magistrates ordered them to receive the birch, usual
    way.—­Reuter.”—­Provincial Paper.

It was kind of Reuter to add this detail.

* * * * *

    “It is understood an order has been issued for the demobilisation
    of men called to the Colours under the last Military Service Act
    after they had attained the age of 441.”—­Provincial Paper.