Arthur.  “WHY, YOU SEE, GRAN’MA—­WE ARE GOING TO ELECT OFFICERS FOR OUR RIFLE CORPS ON MONDAY, AND I DON’T LIKE TO BE OUT OF IT!”

"Punch,” June 30, 1860.]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  OUR SPECIALS.

Special’s Wife.  “CONTRARY TO REGULATIONS, INDEED!  FIDDLESTICKS!  I MUST INSIST, FREDERICK, UPON YOUR TAKING THIS HOT BRANDY-AND-WATER.  I SHALL BE HAVING YOU LAID UP NEXT, AND NOT FIT FOR ANYTHING.”

"Punch,” April 22, 1848.]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  CURIOUS ECHO AT A RAILWAY STATION.

Traveller.  “PORTER!  PORTER!”

Echo.  “DON’T YOU WISH YOU MAY GET HIM?”

"Punch,” October 19, 1861.]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  THE RIGHT MEN IN THE RIGHT PLACE; VIZ., A CLUB WINDOW.

Old General Muddle.  “WHAT I SAY, IS—­IS—­EH?  WHAT?  BY JOVE!  WHAT THE DOOCE SHOULD CIVILIANS KNOW ABOUT—­EH?  WHAT—­AHEM!—­MILITARY AFFAIRS!  AFFAIRS!  EH?”

Colonel Splutter.  “HAH!  THE PRESS, SIR!  BY JOVE, THE PRESS IS THE CURSE OF THE COUNTRY, AND WILL BE THE RUIN OF THE ARMY!  BY JOVE, I’D HANG ALL LITTERY MEN—­HANG ’EM, SIR!”

"Punch,” February 27, 1858.]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  WELL INTENDED, NO DOUBT.

Quaker to British Lion.  “THERE, FRIEND!  NOW LET ME PUT AWAY THOSE DANGEROUS VANITIES!”

"Punch,” November 20, 1852.]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  A DISTRESSED AGRICULTURIST.

Landlord.  “WELL, MR. SPRINGWHEAT, ACCORDING TO THE PAPERS, THERE SEEMS TO BE A PROBABILITY OF A CESSATION OF HOSTILITIES.”

Tenant (who strongly approves of War prices).  “GOODNESS, GRACIOUS!  WHY, YOU DON’T MEAN TO SAY THAT THERE’S ANY DANGER OF PEACE!”

"Punch,” February 2, 1856.]

* * * * *

ANTICIPATIONS BY JOHN LEECH.

[Illustration:  THE PARLIAMENTARY FEMALE.

Father of the Family.  “COME, DEAR; WE SO SELDOM GO OUT TOGETHER NOW—­CAN’T YOU TAKE US ALL TO THE PLAY TO-NIGHT?”

Mistress of the House and M.P. “HOW YOU TALK, CHARLES!  DON’T YOU SEE THAT I AM TOO BUSY?  I HAVE A COMMITTEE TOMORROW MORNING, AND I HAVE MY SPEECH ON THE GREAT CROCHET QUESTION TO PREPARE FOR THE EVENING.”

"Punch’s Almanack” for 1853.]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  AN ASTONISHING REQUEST.

Fast young lady (to old gent).  “HAVE YOU SUCH A THING AS A LUCIFER ABOUT YOU, FOR I’VE LEFT MY CIGAR-LIGHTS AT HOME?”

["Punch,” August 29, 1857.]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  NOT VERY LIKELY.

Mistress.  “WELL, I’M SURE!  AND PRAY WHO IS THAT?”