Two Years Ago, Volume I eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 430 pages of information about Two Years Ago, Volume I.

Two Years Ago, Volume I eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 430 pages of information about Two Years Ago, Volume I.
Grace was a saint in the truest sense of that word) had long since made her free of that “communion of saints” which consists not in Pharisaic isolation from “the world,” not in the mutual flatteries and congratulations of a self-conceited clique; but which bears the sins and carries the sorrows of all around:  whose atmosphere is disappointed hopes and plans for good, and the indignation which hates the sin because it loves the sinner, and sacred fear and pity for the self-inflicted miseries of those who might be (so runs the dream, and will run till it becomes a waking reality) strong, and free, and safe, by being good and wise.  To such a spirit this bold cunning man had come, stiff-necked and heaven-defiant, a “brand plucked from the burning:”  and yet equally unconscious of his danger, and thankless for his respite.  Given, too, as it were, into her hands; tossed at her feet out of the very mouth of the pit,—­why but that she might save him?  A far duller heart, a far narrower imagination than Grace’s would have done what Grace’s did—­concentrate themselves round the image of that man with all the love of woman.  For, ere long, Grace found that she did love that man, as a woman loves but once in her life; perhaps in all time to come.  She found that her heart throbbed, her cheek flushed, when his name was mentioned; that she watched, almost unawares to herself, for his passing; and she was not ashamed at the discovery.  It was a sort of melancholy comfort to her that there was a great gulf fixed between them.  His station, his acquirements, his great connections and friends in London (for all Tom’s matters were the gossip of the town, as, indeed, he took care that they should be), made it impossible that he should ever think of her; and therefore she held herself excused for thinking of him, without any fear of that “self-seeking,” and “inordinate affection,” and “unsanctified passions,” which her religious books had taught her to dread.  Besides, he was not “a Christian.”  That five minutes on the shore had told her that; and even if her station had been the same as his, she must not be “unequally yoked with an unbeliever.”  And thus the very hopelessness of her love became its food and strength; the feeling which she would have checked with maidenly modesty, had it been connected even remotely with marriage, was allowed to take immediate and entire dominion; and she held herself permitted to keep him next her heart of hearts, because she could do nothing for him but pray for his conversion.

And pray for him she did, the noble, guileless girl, day and night, that he might be converted; that he might prosper, and become—­perhaps rich, at least useful; a mighty instrument in some good work.  And then she would build up one beautiful castle in the air after another, out of her fancies about what such a man, whom she had invested in her own mind with all the wisdom of Solomon, might do if his “talents were sanctified.”  Then she prayed that he might recover his lost gold—­when it was good for him; that he might discover the thief:  no, that would only involve fresh shame and sorrow:  that the thief, then, might be brought to repentance, and confession, and restitution.  That was the solution of the dark problem, and for that she prayed; while her face grew sadder and sadder day by day.

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Two Years Ago, Volume I from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.