[Sidenote:—­3—­] On this point one of them, Vibius Crispus, [Footnote:  Q.  Vibius Crispus.] was the author of a most witty remark.  Having been compelled for some days by sickness to absent himself from the convivial board, he said:  “If I had not fallen ill, I should certainly have died.”  The entire period of his reign consisted in nothing but carousals and revels.  All the most valuable food products were brought together from the ocean itself (not to go farther) from the earth and from the Mediterranean, and were prepared in so costly a fashion that even now some cakes and other dishes are named Vitellian, after him.  Why should one go into the details of these affairs?  It is admitted by quite everybody that during the period of his reign he expended on dinners two hundred million two thousand five hundred denarii.  There came very near being a famine in all costly articles of food, yet it was imperative that they should be provided.  Once he had a dish made that cost twenty-five myriads, into which he put a mixture of tongues and brains and livers of fish and certain kinds of birds.  As it was impossible to make so large a vessel of pottery, it was made of silver and remained extant for some time, regarded somewhat in the light of a votive offering, until Hadrian finally set eyes on it and had it melted down.

[Sidenote:—­4—­] Since I have mentioned this fact, I will also add another, namely that not even Nero’s Golden House would satisfy Vitellius.  He delighted in and commended the name and the life and all the practices of its former owner, yet he found fault with the structure itself, saying that it had been badly built and was scantily and meanly equipped.  When he fell ill one time he looked about for a room to afford him an abode; so little did even Nero’s surroundings satisfy him.  His wife Galeria ridiculed the small amount of decoration found in the royal apartments.  This pair, as they spent other people’s money, never stopped to count the cost of anything; but those who invited them to meals found themselves in great trouble [save a few whom he compensated for it].  Yet the same persons would not regularly entertain him the entire day, but one set of men furnished breakfast, another lunch, another dinner, and still another certain viands for dessert calculated to stimulate a jaded appetite. [Footnote:  This little phrase is taken direct from Plato’s Critias, 115 B.] [For all who were able were eager to entertain him.] It is said that after the elapse of a few days he spent a hundred myriads upon a dinner. [His birthday celebration lasted over two days and numbers of beasts and of men were slain.]