“Was I tapping it?” demanded Mr. Smith, in surprise.  “Well, I didn’t know it.  I’m glad you told me.”

“You’re quite welcome,” said the steward, sharply.  “Crimping ain’t in my line; I’d sooner sweep the roads.”

“’Ear, ’ear,” exclaimed Mr. Smith, approvingly.  “Ah! wot a thing it is to come acrost an honest man.  Wot a good thing it is for the eyesight.”

He stared stonily somewhere in the direction of Mr. Wilks, and then blinking rapidly shielded his eyes with his hand as though overcome by the sight of so much goodness.  The steward’s wrath rose at the performance, and he glowered back at him until his eyes watered.

“Twenty past six,” said Mr. Smith, suddenly, as he fumbled in his waistcoat-pocket and drew out a small folded paper.  “It’s time I made a start.  I s’pose you’ve got some salt in the house?”

“Plenty,” said Mr. Wilks.

“And beer?” inquired the other.

“Yes, there is some beer,” said the steward.

“Bring me a quart of it,” said the boarding-master, slowly and impressively.  “I want it drawed in a china mug, with a nice foaming ’ead on it.”

“Wot do you want it for?” inquired Mr. Wilks, eyeing him very closely.

“Bisness purposes,” said Mr. Smith.  “If you’re very good you shall see ’ow I do it.”

Still the steward made no move.  “I thought you brought the stuff with you,” he remarked.

Mr. Smith looked at him with mild reproach.  “Are you managing this affair or am I?” he inquired.

The steward went out reluctantly, and drawing a quart mug of beer set it down on the table and stood watching his visitor.

“And now I want a spoonful o’ sugar, a spoonful o’ salt, and a spoonful o’ vinegar,” said Mr. Smith.  “Make haste afore the ’ead goes off of it.”

Mr. Wilks withdrew grumbling, and came back in a wonderfully short space of time considering, with the articles required.

“Thankee,” said the other; “you ’ave been quick.  I wish I could move as quick as you do.  But you can take ’em back now, I find I can do without ’em.”

“Where’s the beer?” demanded the incensed Mr. Wilks; where’s the beer, you underhanded swab?”

“I altered my mind,” said Mr. Smith, “and not liking waste, and seeing by your manner that you’ve ’ad more than enough already to-night, I drunk it.  There isn’t another man in Sunwich I could ha’ played that trick on, no, nor a boy neither.”

Mr. Wilks was about to speak, but, thinking better of it, threw the three spoons in the kitchen, and resuming his seat by the fire sat with his back half turned to his visitor.

“Bright, cheerful young chap, ’e is,” said Mr. Smith; “you’ve knowed ’im ever since he was a baby, haven’t you?”

Mr. Wilks made no reply.

“The Conqueror’s sailing to-morrow morning, too,” continued his tormentor; “his father’s old ship.  ’Ow strange it’ll seem to ’im following it out aboard a whaler.  Life is full o’ surprises, Mr. Wilks, and wot a big surprise it would be to you if you could ’ear wot he says about you when he comes to ’is senses.”