The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 02, No. 13, November, 1858 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 309 pages of information about The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 02, No. 13, November, 1858.

The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 02, No. 13, November, 1858 eBook

This eBook from the Gutenberg Project consists of approximately 309 pages of information about The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 02, No. 13, November, 1858.

“And then I told you that I believed in you as I believed in little else, in this world or the next; and I said, that, if in my hour of shame and outcasting, I could implore the help of any human being, I would come to you before all others.  I have come.  You thought me raving then, and pitied me, because you did not understand.  Presently you will understand, and you will still pity me,—­but with a difference.

“I fled away that very night, you recollect,—­fled from my self-contempt, from the sickening scorn I felt for them,—­for him.”

There was agony in the effort with which she uttered that last word.  She named no names, but, with a sort of desperation, raised her head and looked Miss Wimple in the face; in the quick, sensitive glances they interchanged at that moment the omission was supplied.

“Though my flight was premeditated, I took with me no clothes save those I wore; but I had concealed on my person every jewel and trinket I possessed.  With these,—­for I readily converted them into money,—­I purchased a safe asylum in an obscure but decent family, whose poverty did not afford them the indulgence of a scrupulous fastidiousness or impertinent curiosity; it was enough for their straitened conscience that I had the manners and the purse of a lady, —­they asked no questions which might cost them a profitable boarder, the only one they could accommodate in their poor way.  I had no fear that any hue-and-cry would be raised for me; I had left behind me two who would prevent that,—­in that, my worst foes were my best friends.  If I had any relatives who cared for me enough to pursue me, I rejoiced in at least one sister on whose cunning, if not good sense, I could rely, to convince them of the futility of such efforts,—­one friend whose fears would be ingenious and busy to put the best-laid chase at fault.

“So I lay concealed and safe till the time came when I had to purchase pity, help, and precious secrecy.  My discreet hosts could furnish those extras; but they were poor, and such luxuries are expensive in New York;—­it was not long before my last dollar was gone.  I had been ill,—­ill, Miss Wimple,—­and every way crippled; I could not, if the work had offered itself to me, have earned more then.  My last trinket was gone; I had pawned whatever I could spare from the hard exigencies of living; for I am no coward,—­I did not wish to die,—­I had challenged my fate, and would meet it.  I had even changed with the women of the house the silk dress I wore, and my fine linen, for the mean rags you cleansed me of last night, —­that they might pay themselves so; and when all was expended, and the last trick tried that pride, honor, and modesty could wink at, I came away in the night, leaving no unsettled scores behind me.  But I saw my own resources sinking fast; I knew I must presently be debtor to some one for protection, aid, and counsel.  I remembered you,—­and that I had said I could beg of none but you; therefore I am here.

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The Atlantic Monthly, Volume 02, No. 13, November, 1858 from Project Gutenberg. Public domain.