and stale bachelors ruminate of this, “If we could live without wives,” as Marcellus Numidicus said in [5954] Agellius, “we would all want them; but because we cannot, let all marry, and consult rather to the public good, than their own private pleasure or estate.”  It were an happy thing, as wise [5955]Euripides hath it, if we could buy children with gold and silver, and be so provided, sine mulierum congressu, without women’s company; but that may not be: 

[5956] “Orbis jacebit squallido turpis situ,
        Vanum sine ullis classibus stabit mare,
        Alesque coelo deerit et sylvis fera.”

       “Earth, air, sea, land eftsoon would come to nought,
        The world itself should be to ruin brought.”

Necessity therefore compels us to marry.

But what do I trouble myself, to find arguments to persuade to, or commend marriage? behold a brief abstract of all that which I have said, and much more, succinctly, pithily, pathetically, perspicuously, and elegantly delivered in twelve motions to mitigate the miseries of marriage, by [5957] Jacobus de Voragine,

1.  Res est? habes quae tucatur et augeat.—­2.  Non est? habes quae quaerat.—­3.  Secundae res sunt? felicitas duplicatur.—­4.  Adversae sunt?  Consolatur, adsidet, onus participat ut tolerabile fiat.—­5.  Domi es? solitudinis taedium pellit.—­6.  Foras?  Discendentem visu prosequitur, absentem desiderat, redeuntem laeta excipit.—­7.  Nihil jucundum absque societate?  Nulla societas matrimonio suavior.—­8.  Vinculum conjugalis charitatis adamentinum.—­9.  Accrescit dulcis affinium turba, duplicatur numerus parentum, fratrum, sororum, nepotum.—­10.  Pulchra sis prole parens.—­11.  Lex Mosis sterilitatem matrimonii execratur, quanto amplius coelibatum?—­12.  Si natura poenam non effugit, ne voluntas quidem effugiet.

1.  Hast thou means? thou hast none to keep and increase it.—­2.  Hast none? thou hast one to help to get it.—­3.  Art in prosperity? thine happiness is doubled.—­4.  Art in adversity? she’ll comfort, assist, bear a part of thy burden to make it more tolerable.—­5.  Art at home? she’ll drive away melancholy.—­6.  Art abroad? she looks after thee going from home, wishes for thee in thine absence, and joyfully welcomes thy return.—­7.  There’s nothing delightsome without society, no society so sweet as matrimony.—­8.  The band of conjugal love is adamantine.—­9.  The sweet company of kinsmen increaseth, the number of parents is doubled, of brothers, sisters, nephews.—­10.  Thou art made a father by a fair and happy issue.—­11.  Moses curseth the barrenness of matrimony, how much more a single life?—­12.  If nature escape not punishment, surely thy will shall not avoid it.

All this is true, say you, and who knows it not? but how easy a matter is it to answer these motives, and to make an Antiparodia quite opposite unto it?  To exercise myself I will essay: