“Now, among all his travellers there was none more successful, more abandoned, and more valuable to Ti Hung than Li Ting.  So depraved was Li Ting that he was never known to visit the tombs of his ancestors; indeed, it was said that he had been heard to mock their venerable memories, and that he had jestingly offered to sell them to anyone who should chance to be without ancestors of his own.  This objectionable person would call at the houses of the most illustrious Mandarins, and would command the slaves to carry to their masters his tablets, on which were inscribed his name and his virtues.  Reaching their presence, he would salute them with the greeting of an equal, ’How is your stomach?’ and then proceed to exhibit samples of his wares, greatly overrating their value.  ‘Behold!’ he would exclaim, ’is not this elegantly-moulded idol worthy of the place of honour in this sumptuous mansion which my presence defiles to such an extent that twelve basins of rose-water will not remove the stain?  Are not its eyes more delicate than the most select of almonds? and is not its stomach rounder than the cupolas upon the high temple at Peking?  Yet, in spite of its perfections, it is not worthy of the acceptance of so distinguished a Mandarin, and therefore I will accept in return the quarter-tael, which, indeed, is less than my illustrious master gives for the clay alone.’

“In this manner Li Ting disposed of many idols at high rates, and thereby endeared himself so much to the avaricious heart of Ti Hung that he promised him his beautiful daughter Ning in marriage.

“Ning was indeed very lovely.  Her eyelashes were like the finest willow twigs that grow in the marshes by the Yang-tse-Kiang; her cheeks were fairer than poppies; and when she bathed in the Hoang Ho, her body seemed transparent.  Her brow was finer than the most polished jade; while she seemed to walk, like a winged bird, without weight, her hair floating in a cloud.  Indeed, she was the most beautiful creature that has ever existed.”

“Now may you grow thin and shrivel up like a fallen lemon; but it is false!” cried Wang Yu, starting up suddenly and unexpectedly.  “At Chee Chou, at the shop of ‘The Heaven-sent Sugar-cane,’ there lives a beautiful and virtuous girl who is more than all that.  Her eyes are like the inside circles on the peacock’s feathers; her teeth are finer than the scales on the Sacred Dragon; her—­”

“If it is the wish of this illustriously-endowed gathering that this exceedingly illiterate paper tiger should occupy their august moments with a description of the deformities of the very ordinary young person at Chee Chou,” said Kai Lung imperturbably, “then the remainder of the history of the noble-minded Yung Chang can remain until an evil fate has overtaken Wang Yu, as it assuredly will shortly.”

“A fair wind raises no storm,” said Wang Yu sulkily; and Kai Lung continued: