Peace and seclusion at the club afforded no relief however.  George was really very trying at tea.  He accused the bread because the crust had not a hairy exterior (generally accumulated by its conveyance in a blanket or sandbag).  He ridiculed the sugar ration—­I don’t believe he has ever been short in his life; and the resources of the place were unequal to the task of providing tea of sufficient strength to admit of the spoon being stood upright in it—­a consistency to which, he said, he had grown accustomed.  When I left him he was bullying the hall-porter of the club for a soft-nosed pencil; ink, he explained, being an abomination.

I also saw him pay 21/2d. for a Daily Mail.

* * * * *

I got a letter from George just before he went back.  He patronized me delightfully—­seemed more than half a Colonial already.  He said he was glad to have seen us all again, but was equally glad to be getting back, as he was beginning to feel a little homesick.  He hinted we were dull dogs and treated people we didn’t know like strangers.  Didn’t we ever cheer up?  He became very unjust, I thought, when he said that France was at war, but that we had only an Army and Navy.

Incidentally I had to pay twopence on the letter, the postman insisting that George’s neat signature in the bottom left-hand corner of the envelope was an insufficient substitute for a penny stamp.

* * * * *

    “The raiders came in three suctions.”—­Evening News.

So that was what blocked the Tubes.

* * * * *

[Illustration:  THE LETTER AND THE SPIRIT.

     Air Raid
    Reprisals—­
   Lloyd George
      says
  We’ll give them
      HELL

PRIME MINISTER.  “YOU YOUNG RASCAL!  I NEVER SAID THAT.”

NEWSBOY.  “WELL, I’LL LAY YER MEANT IT.”]

* * * * *

[Illustration:  Keeper.  “ANY BIRDS, SIR?”

Officer (fresh from France).  “YES.  THREE CRASHED; TWO DOWN OUT OF CONTROL.”]

* * * * *

THE WATCH DOGS.

LXVI.

MY DEAR CHARLES,—­Here is a war, producing great men, and here am I writing to you from time to time about it and never mentioning one of them.  I have touched upon Commanding Officers, Brigadiers, Divisional, Corps, even Army Commanders; I have gone so far as to mention the COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF once and I have mentioned myself very many times.  But the really great men I have omitted.  I mean the really, really great men, without whom the War could not possibly go on, and with whom, I am often led to suppose, the decision remains as to what day Peace shall be declared.  Take the A.M.L.O. at ——­ for example.