“Oh, I’m wretched!  Oh, I’m wretched!  I can’t go on like this:  it’s choking me.  It’s too hard to be misunderstood and to see them all siding against you because they’re stronger.  However, when you’ve got nothing to reproach yourself with and your conscious is clear, why, then I say, ‘I won’t have it!  I won’t have it!’”

In her anger she began rebeling against circumstances, and getting up, she dried her eyes, and walked about in much agitation.

“I won’t have it!  They can say what they like, but it’s not my fault!  Am I a bad lot, eh?  I give away all I’ve got; I wouldn’t crush a fly!  It’s they who are bad!  Yes, it’s they!  I never wanted to be horrid to them.  And they came dangling after me, and today they’re kicking the bucket and begging and going to ruin on purpose.”

Then she paused in front of Labordette and tapped his shoulders.

“Look here,” she said, “you were there all along; now speak the truth:  did I urge them on?  Weren’t there always a dozen of ’em squabbling who could invent the dirtiest trick?  They used to disgust me, they did!  I did all I knew not to copy them:  I was afraid to.  Look here, I’ll give you a single instance:  they all wanted to marry me!  A pretty notion, eh?  Yes, dear boy, I could have been countess or baroness a dozen times over and more, if I’d consented.  Well now, I refused because I was reasonable.  Oh yes, I saved ’em some crimes and other foul acts!  They’d have stolen, murdered, killed father and mother.  I had only to say one word, and I didn’t say it.  You see what I’ve got for it today.  There’s Daguenet, for instance; I married that chap off!  I made a position for the beggarly fellow after keeping him gratis for weeks!  And I met him yesterday, and he looks the other way!  Oh, get along, you swine!  I’m less dirty than you!”

She had begun pacing about again, and now she brought her fist violently down on a round table.

“By God it isn’t fair!  Society’s all wrong.  They come down on the women when it’s the men who want you to do things.  Yes, I can tell you this now:  when I used to go with them—­see?  I didn’t enjoy it; no, I didn’t enjoy it one bit.  It bored me, on my honor.  Well then, I ask you whether I’ve got anything to do with it!  Yes, they bored me to death!  If it hadn’t been for them and what they made of me, dear boy, I should be in a convent saying my prayers to the good God, for I’ve always had my share of religion.  Dash it, after all, if they have dropped their money and their lives over it, what do I care?  It’s their fault.  I’ve had nothing to do with it!”

“Certainly not,” said Labordette with conviction.

Zoe ushered in Mignon, and Nana received him smilingly.  She had cried a good deal, but it was all over now.  Still glowing with enthusiasm, he complimented her on her installation, but she let him see that she had had enough of her mansion and that now she had other projects and would sell everything up one of these days.  Then as he excused himself for calling on the ground that he had come about a benefit performance in aid of old Bose, who was tied to his armchair by paralysis, she expressed extreme pity and took two boxes.  Meanwhile Zoe announced that the carriage was waiting for Madame, and she asked for her hat and as she tied the strings told them about poor, dear Satin’s mishap, adding: