O. LUS.  Good, good, indeed; the best that e’er I heard.

O. ART.  I promise you, it was exceeding good.

FUL.  Oft I frequented her abode by night,
And courted her, and spake her wond’rous fair;
But ever somewhat did offend her sight,
Either my double ruff or my long hair;
My scarf was vain, my garments hung too low,
My Spanish shoe was cut too broad at toe.

ALL.  Ha, ha! the best that ever I heard!

FUL.  I parted for that time, and came again,
Seeming to be conform’d in look and speech;
My shoes were sharp-toed, and my band was plain,
Close to my thigh my metamorphos’d breech;
My cloak was narrow-cap’d, my hair cut shorter;
Off went my scarf, thus march’d I to the porter.

ALL.  Ha, ha! was ever heard the like?

FUL.  The porter, spying me, did lead me in,
Where his fair mistress sat reading of a chapter;
Peace to this house, quoth I, and those within,
Which holy speech with admiration wrapp’d her;
And ever as I spake, and came her nigh,
Seeming divine, turn’d up the white of eye.

JUS.  So, so, what then?

O. LUS.  Forward, I pray, forward, sir.

FUL.  I spake divinely, and I call’d her sister,
And by this means we were acquainted well: 
By yea and nay, I will, quoth I, and kiss’d her. 
She blush’d, and said, that long-tongu’d men would tell;
I swore[18] to be as secret as the night,
And said, on sooth, I would put out the light.

O. ART.  In sooth he would! a passing-passing jest.

FUL.  O, do not swear, quoth she, yet put it out,
Because I would not have you break your oath. 
I felt a bed there, as I grop’d about;
In troth, quoth I, here will we rest us both. 
Swear you, in troth, quoth she? had you not sworn,
I had not done’t, but took it in full scorn: 
Then you will come, quoth I? though I be loth,
I’ll come, quoth she, be’t but to keep your oath.

JUS.  ’Tis very pretty; but now, when’s the jest?

O. ART.  O, forward, to the jest in any case.

O. LUS.  I would not, for an angel, lose the jest.

FUL.  Here’s right the dunghill cock that finds a pearl. 
To talk of wit to these, is as a man
Should cast out jewels to a herd of swine—­[aside.]
Why, in the last words did consist the jest.

O. LUS.  Ay, in the last words? ha, ha, ha! 
It was an excellent admired jest—­
To them that understood it.

    Enter YOUNG MASTER ARTHUR, with two cups of wine.

JUS.  It was, indeed; I must, for fashion’s sake,
Say as they say; but otherwise, O, God! [Aside. 
Good Master Arthur, thanks for our good cheer.

Y. ART.  Gentlemen, welcome all; now hear me speak—­
One special cause that mov’d me lead you hither,
Is for an ancient grudge that hath long since
Continued ’twixt my modest wife and me: 
The wrongs that I have done her I recant. 
In either hand I hold a sev’ral cup,
This in the right hand, wife, I drink to thee,
This in the left hand, pledge me in this draught,
Burying all former hatred; so, have to thee. [He drinks.