* * * * *

AN OPEN CONGRESSIONAL COUNTENANCE.

It is oddly enough objected to the re-election of a certain Member of Congress from Massachusetts, that “he can’t open his mouth.”  It might be answered that Gen. BUTLER is quite able to open his mouth wide enough for the whole delegation.  The mouth may be opened for two purposes, viz., speech-making and swallowing; and it never appeared to us that there was any lack either of Bolting or Bellering in the House of Representatives.  However notably Honorable Gentlemen may play the game either of Gab or Grab, it isn’t so clear that their constituents are much benefited by these accomplishments.  If all they want is an open-mouthed Member, why don’t the Massachusetts men import a first-class crocodile, and send him to the National Menagerie in Washington?

* * * * *

SPREAD OF AMERICAN PRINCIPLES.

It is with a heart full of patriotic pride and gratitude that Mr. PUNCHINELLO observes the adoption, in his dear native Italy, of the manners and customs of the Land of his Adoption.  At an election recently held in Rome, about something or some other thing, one enterprising Roman has been discovered who voted “yes” twenty-five times in as many electoral urns—­thereby, it is to be presumed, earning a good deal of money.  We have a more lively hope for charming Italy when we find even a single citizen exhibiting a skill which would do honor to the most accomplished professional voter in New York.  There is something encouraging in finding the Sons of ST. PETER becoming, every one of them, Re-Peters.

* * * * *

To Commentators.

The “Sun of York,” mentioned in Richard III., has no reference to the “Sun of New York” neither was the quotation, “Who is here so base, that would be a bondman?” especially meant for application to “THE” ALLEN.

* * * * *

Beatific.

They talk a great deal about the twenty-eight inch beet they have grown in California, but a policeman of this city has a beat three miles long.

* * * * *

[Illustration:  “SICH A GITTIN’ UP STARES.”

1st festive Cuss. “WHAT MAKES FOLKS STARE AT US SO?”

2d Festive Cuss. “ON ACCOUNT OF OUR ELEGANT COSTOOM, I GUESS.  THEY TAKE YOU FOR WALL STREET, AND ME FOR FIFTH AVENUE.”]

* * * * *

OUR EYE-WITNESS AT THE ELECTIONS.

We suppose that no individual has rendered more invaluable service as a historian than the distinguished Eye-witness of the newspapers.  The friends of PUNCHINELLO will therefore be rejoiced to hear that this accurate reporter was engaged to detail for our readers the progress of the late elections.