The Sun.

“We hail with joy the accession of PUNCHINELLO to the ranks of independent journalism as embodied in the Sun, with a circulation of over 100,000, CHAS. B. DANA Editor, price two cents.  Reinforced by this powerful journal, we shall continue with renewed vigor to demand of HORACE GREELEY his reasons why J.C.  BANCROFT DAVIS should not be removed from the Assistant Secretaryship of State.  We shall persevere in our attempts to make Gen. GRANT understand that to move four and a half inches from the White House is an infraction of the Constitution.  Regardless of the tears of the thousands of advertisers who carry their announcements to our office, we shall devote our entire space to the vilifying of BORIE, FISH, the Disreputable Times and False Reporting Tribune.  Those elaborate attacks upon moral corruption and the Erie Ring, for which we have become famous, will remain specialties with us.  All this by PUNCHINELLO’S aid.  Bully for PUNCHINELLO.”

The Tribune.

“The moral influence of this paper, which retains the only correspondent at the seat of war, and whose dispatches, procured at a cost of over $2,000,000, are copied by the Herald, Sun and World,—­(and whoever denies it lies damnably, with intent to malign, etc.,)—­the moral influence of this paper is rapidly extending itself throughout the country.  As a late instance, we note that PUNCHINELLO has given in its adhesion to the only true and pure republican agricultural party, which it appropriately names the “Right Party.”  PUNCHINELLO was once a frivolous, good-for-nothing sheet, devoted to low jokes and witticisms.  The conversion of its editor to the temperance cause is the reason of the recent change in its tenets.  We bid it God speed.”

The World.

“As the irrefutable and all-enduring truths of Democracy receive exemplification in contemporaneous events, the reflecting and refined masses of this city purchase the World in preference to that decrepit and fast decaying sheet, the Herald.  PUNCHINELLO, recognizing with ethereal foresight the exigencies of the situation, proclaims itself for the “Right Party”—­our party.  We welcome with acclamation this valuable addition to the Democratic ranks.”

The Star.

“PUNCHINELLO has joined the Right Party, by which he obviously means the Star, whose circulation last Sunday exceeded 375,005 copies.

“But this has nothing to do with the domestic policy of the Peruvians, as expounded by the first CAESAR.

“PUNCHINELLO will prove a pillar of strength to Tammany Hall, unless the siege of Paris should prove disastrous to the consumption of lager-bier, as set forth in ‘Boiled for her Bones’ and other tales by the best authors.”

But Personals, my dear Star, Personals are the things that pay.  If thus, why not?  As thus: 

“EDITOR OF PUNCHINELLO.  The Editor of PUNCHINELLO has an income of about $500,000.  He usually dines at the Hoffman House when out of State’s Prison.  He owns some fine lots somewhere underneath the East River, besides a brown stone front in Alaska.”