WHERE TO GO.

Those who are fond of flees may flee to the mountains.  I know when I’ve got enough, and I prefer to surf it on the sea shore.  Take the 3-1/2 A.M. train, and come to

SANDY POINT.

Everything here is sand as far as the eye can reach, or a horse and wagon, with a profane driver, can travel.  The ocean laves the beach.  The sea also is here.  The tide comes in twice a day.  This alone gives Sandy Point a great advantage over all other points on the coast.

I rode up in the regular conveyance, and soon after my arrival found myself standing on the spacious and elegant piazza of

THE CHARNEL HOUSE,

a palatial structure erected by the late Mr. CHARNEL, who is said to have lavished an immense fortune upon it.  Strictly speaking, he didn’t lavish quite so much paint on the front as an advanced civilization had a right to expect; but within, everything, (including the clerk,) appears to have been furnished with an eye to

LUXURIOUS COMFORT,

Mr. SOAPINGTON, the genial landlord, Mr. RICHARD SOAPINGTON, Jr., the gentlemanly clerk, Mrs. SOAPINGTON, the accomplished hostess, and the lovely Miss CLARA SOAPINGTON, all greeted me with that hearty welcome, so dear to the traveller.  SOAPINGTON said he was glad to see me, and, seeing that it was me, he would be willing to infringe on his inflexible rule, and would allow me to pay

CASH IN ADVANCE.

Madame S. was sorry she couldn’t set me up a cot in the wash-room, but would be compelled to let me have a double front-room over the bar.  I told her if the apartment had a practicable trap door I thought I could get along.

RICHARD S., Jr., was sure he had met me before; and, as a friend, he would say the establishment was not responsible for valuables unless deposited in the safe.  He would take my watch and jewelry to wear while I was there, inasmuch as

HE WAS THE SAFE HIMSELF.

The charming Miss S. didn’t say anything, but she smiled, and looked such unutterable things from behind the blinds, that I expect to find it all in the bill.

Everybody that can get a railroad pass should come to Sandy Point

WHAT TO DO.

Sit in the reading-room and look over the torn files of two daily papers a week and a half old; or study a hotel advertiser.

THE SURF BATHING

is magnificent.  The prevalence of an unmitigated undertow renders it quite exhilarating for old ladies and invalids.  Any one who is drowned will have every attention paid to his remains,—­by the sharks.

BOATING.

Everybody boats.  The ROWE Brothers are here, and sing on the water by moonlight.  You can blister your bands at an oar, or bale out the boat, just as your taste inclines.  As the life-preserver is a little out of repair, I stay on shore.

FISHING.

Everybody fishes.  There are all varieties, from speckled trout and mackerel, up to conger eels, horse mackerel, and porpoises.  Parties frequently come back with all the fishing they want.  If absent a week on a trip, they can make arrangements to have their board run on just the same.