In France they do not wait for the completion of the years of adolescence to dub a scion of the royal family with the title of “man.”  The Prince Imperial, prior to his departure for the wars, was presented at Court as the “first gentleman” of France.  For a youth of fourteen he is said to have gone through the trying ceremonies with great credit until directed by his mamma to dance with a venerable female of noble blood, just as he was about to lend a beautiful American miss through the mazes of a Schottische.  The son of his father took one glance at the ancient dame, and one at the lovely creature beside him, and then set up a right royal blubber of disappointment.

“Remember, my son,” said EUGENIE, “you are a man now, and men never cry.”

“Oh! mamma,” sighed the afflicted Prince, “let me be a boy again, rather than dance with cette vieille yonder!”

Alas! for the ambition of monarchs, who put forward their beardless progeny to do the deeds of men, and to suffer with men’s fortitude, when they are more fit to be puling in a nurse’s arms, or unravelling silk skeins for some maid of honor.

* * * * *

THE WATERING PLACES.

Punchinello’s Vacations.

It was hot when Mr. PUNCHINELLO started for Niagara.  So hot that no allusions to Fahrenheit would give an idea of the tremendous preponderance of caloric in the atmosphere.  The trip was full of discomforts, and there was great danger, at one time, that the train would arrive at Niagara with a load of desiccated bodies.  Of course the water all boiled away in the engine-tanks, causing endless stoppages; and of course the hot sun, pouring directly upon the roof of the cars, caused the boards thereof to curl up and twist about in such fantastic fashion, that they afforded no protection whatever to the passengers, who were obliged to resort to sunshades and umbrellas, or get under the seats.  Added to this were the facts that the ice-water in the coolers scalded the mouth; the brass-work on the seats blistered the hands; and the empty stoves, almost red-hot from their exposure to the sun, superheated the cars to a degree that was maddening.  Added to these was the fact that the intense heat expanded the rails until they were several miles longer than usual, and thus the passengers suffered the tortures of the transit for an increased length of time.

When, at last, Mr. P. was conveyed, in a stifling hack, (the fare had risen, under the unusual circumstances, about one hundred and ten degrees,) to a stifling little room under the hot roof of an hotel exposed to the sun on every side, and had taken an extempore Russian bath while changing his linen, and had partaken of a hot dinner, he might have been excused for saying that he would like to cool off a little.

Inquiring if there was any stream of water convenient, he was directed to the river Niagara, which runs hard by the hotel.