Hopin’ you are sound on the goose and able to enjoy your Swi lager und
Sweitzer,

I am thine, old hoss,

HIRAM GREEN, Esq.,

Lait Gustise of the Peece.

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TREATMENT FOR POTATO BUGS.

Mr. CLARK JOHNSON, of Pendleton, Indiana, not at all discouraged by the signal failures of many previous campaigns against the Bug, has entered the (potato) field with a new weapon, viz.:  a mixture of Paris Green and Ashes.  Applied frequently, as a Top Dressing, this gentle stimulant imparts a new energy to the vine, and also to the Bug, who thus becomes so vigorous, and at the same time restless, that an uncontrollable impulse seizes him to visit the home of his ancestors, (Colorado.) Here, as is supposed by Mr. JOHNSON, the fictitious energy that had been supplied by the Mixture deserts the immigrant, who now settles down contentedly, nor ever roams again.

As (owing to the present facilities of freighting, etc.,) the Potatoes of Pendleton may eventually find the New York market, which always invites the superior esculent, we would like to suggest to Mr. JOHNSON that this Mixture be administered to the Bug with a spoon, and not sprinkled promiscuously on the ground.  We have drank Tea with a “green flavor,” and found it comparatively innocuous; but Potatoes with a green flavor, (especially if flavored by the JOHNSONIAN method,) we should consider as doubtful, to say the least.  It is the general impression that there is nothing Green in Paris; but your house painter knows there is such a thing as Paris Green, and that it is the oxyde of copper.  Therefore, should one eat many of the potatoes nourished as above, we should expect to see him gradually turning into a Bronze Statue—­a fate which, unless he were particularly Greeky and nice-looking, we should wish to anticipate, if possible, in the interests of art.

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[Illustration:  MR. SWACHENBACKER, OF THE AIRY ’UN SOCIETY, CREATES A SENSATION AMONG THE LADY BATHERS AT “THE BRANCH,” BY APPEARING AMONG THEM AS A MERMAN, WITH A REAL LOOKING-GLASS AND A FALSE TAIL.]

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Fashionable Intelligence.

Two colors that once were fashionable in the Parisian toilette, viz.:  BISMARCK brown and Prussian blue, are now excluded from court circles, by command of the Empress.

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Weather or No.

Most remarkable in the history of mathematics are the calculations published by the weather-prophet of the Express.  Arithmetic turns pale when she glances at them, and, striking her multiplication table with her algebraic knuckles, demands to know why the Express does not add a Cube-it to its THATCHER.

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